Pengalaman Model United Nation Pertamaku

Ikutan Model United Nation adalah mimpiku sejak SMP, meskipun keinginan itu hanya berdasarkan gengsi semata dan aku ga begitu mengerti apa sebetulnya yang dilakukan selama kegiatan itu. Pokoknya setiap kali melihat beberapa orang yang kukenal di medsos sedang flexing megang plakat MUN, pakai jas rapi, duduk di aula luxurious: they all looked really fancy. Baru setelah kuliah aku tahu kalau ikut MUN itu bukan hanya tentang keren-kerenan berlagak ala diplomat, tapi kita sebagai peserta harus punya skill debat, pidato, negosiasi, menulis, dan kepempinan yang bagus agar diakui sebegai delegasi yang baik dan dapat penghargaan seperti Best Delegate, Honorable Mention, dll. Kalaupun merasa ga punya skills yang aku sebutkan di atas, ternyata boleh-boleh aja ikut. Resikonya hanyalah ga dapet penghargaan aja, so it’s pretty much a nothing-to-lose situation, at least for me.

JAVA MUN delegates after closing ceremony

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What is it Like Being A ‘Maba’: An Honest Observation

What Is it like being a 'maba'

This morning I woke up and spent some good reflective minutes thinking about how these past two month after I got accepted to unpad had treated me and what I feel about it. This surely has been an emotional roller-coaster; dense-but-loose bag of lessons; a good-yet-dissapointing kickstart that I may regret later in life. Things are not working as I imagined them to be, I get worn out so easily; which is apparently explainable given that this whole uni activities are hella hectic; something that I don’t used to went through in my homeschooling years.

What was hard is figured out that I’m not the smartest person in the room; I more often that not am just an average. Some of my friends appear to be very passionate (to join heaps of organisations and extracurricular units at the same time), brave (to raise their hand, to lead a project, to speak up in front of the class), and keen-witted individuals. I am not, very far away from that.

I also recently just experienced my first failure in my uni life; I got rejected from joining unpad’s English Speaking Union, yeay! Though I wholeheartedly believe that this is just a smaller-sized success that help me to learn, I couldn’t help but crying my heart out; it did make my day gone blue. I even put a long ass time to think about what did I do wrong in the interview; am I that bad and uncapable? Yes, there you go all the self-doubts and whatnot.

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What happens when we don’t care about having a career

What Is it like being a 'maba'(1)

As I finished my high school diploma and getting ready to pursue a bachelor’s degree in political science, I find something interesting. I encounter quite a large number of people of my age being abundantly worried and confused about which college major is worth to choose. They eventually choose a specific major based on job prospects. While I understand where this consternation comes from, given that we need to earn a decent income to live comfortably and to survive in this crazy world, I’d argue that this mindset is not the best one to embrace, at least for me.

For one thing, choosing a college major based on future job outlook tends to be quite stressful. Pursuing fancy majors and therefore having ‘respected’ jobs and stable income is the idea that society dictated us to have. It is what I think as one of the reasons why depression has surged to epidemic levels in recent decades as it has impacted millions of people. Amid complexities of modern life, with all its pressure, many people see life as a showroom, where your job and status define your worth as a human being. I see this as a societal/psychological challenge we have to tackle for a better future.

I think one of the solutions to this problem is to adopt a healthier perspective that we choose a specific major only because we love it and not what other people say. Yes, it is cliche, but I do still find even myself and plenty of people around me being kind of submissive to the external force. When we genuinely love what we study and give the best effort to it, we no longer need to worry about the future job. It will look for us in reverse as we are the experts in whichever field. Besides, all areas of study are equally valuable if you want to take a peek to its essence rather than the value that society gives.

Long before I opt to study political science, I have always been interested in political issues around the world. It can about Jokowi-Prabowo’s presidential race, the Yellow Vest demonstration, the Hongkong anti-extradition bill protest, the Korean conflicts, Theresa May’s resignation, Ibrahim Zakzaky’s political movement in Nigeria, and so on so forth. I wondered what it means to have power? What are state and nation? How some conflict appears and winds down, what is the far-right ideology, traditional conservatism, Marxism, social democracy? All these questions have been lingering on my mind, and I really can’t wait to figure that out. It is safe for me to say that I don’t mind about postgraduate jobs and I’ve stopped caring about a career since I’ve let myself to enroll in this course for the sake of it. I don’t know, but this kind of mindset is somehow liberating like a breath of fresh air.

This thing works if you know yourself and what you love/passionate about. I know a friend of mine who had no idea what major she wanted to pursue. Eventually, she chose whatever option available rather than asses the importance of each option beforehand. If you’re part of the crowd who still haven’t gotten your heart set on any fields of study, it’s okay everyone has their own time. But one thing I want to point out is maybe this plight is what “formal” school accountable for. I argue that schools distract students to freely explore whatever they passionate about by giving too much content, too many subjects. Students are not getting enough time for genuine learning or reflection, and that’s what happened to my friend.

Another thing just to remember why caring about a career before studying in college is no use is that degrees are no longer a guarantee of getting a job or better pay nowadays. It is no secret that information learned during college is not always useful for actual work demands. Unless you opt to work as traditional “professionals” like doctors or engineers, your skills and experiences are much more looked for than your degrees and certificates.

Ever since I started my homeschooling years and having conversations/listening to many activists (SJW, whatever you call it), I’ve come to the conclusion that caring about our career may sometimes characterize us as selfish individuals. It’s like okay, I choose this job because of the money; I want to become more prosperous by myself. Meanwhile, our nation still has a lot of problems, it is burning and choking on its smoke. The education system, mindset, infrastructure, segregation, corruption, lack of identity, social gap are the problems we’re facing. Yet, we choose not to give a damn. I believe that humanity should be our raison d’etre, regardless of what path we’re on. What I mean by that, our job/career shouldn’t be the final goal, because if it is then what’s the point of our existence.

So there you go, I hope this reaches you (and I) well.

An Abstract Feeling and Sensation: “The Sublime”

There was this ineffable, weird, ambiguous, and hazy sensation that I’ve been experiencing for the past five years; probably, it was after puberty hit me. And I thought myself insane as I was quite sure that nobody would feel this particular sensation like I was. This strange temporary sensation enters my mind whenever I went traveling and get to see a row of enormous mountains of Alborz or the tropical landscape in Lombok. The feeling also comes when witnessing the vast night sky from my house’s attic window, and I get to see millions of stars moving at a million miles a day. It enters when I see huge skyscrapers in a city or whenever I’m watching some cinematic nature videos showing the splendid and grandeur of god’s creations that beyond all the possibility of calculation or imitation. I get this feeling even more tensely when I think of the galaxies in our universe, how it can be so huge to the point where humans didn’t discover all of it yet.

It made me feel that my existence, human activities, and interaction are so insignificant as all of these big things around us would keep turning, moving, and existing even without us here.

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Food For Thought #1: Neuro-Semantics

Tulisan di blog ini memang ngalor-ngidul. Aku ingat tulisan pertamaku betopik psikologi remaja. Lalu tiba-tiba loncat ke matematika, seni, sains, jurnalisme, politik, jurnal jalan-jalan, review buku,  filsafat, dan musik. Dan sekarang, aku menulis satu topik yang baru lagi: Neuro-Semantics. Jadi, tanggal 7 April lalu, aku ikut acara pelatihan Neuro-Semantics++ (plus plus). Instruktur (coach)-nya bernama Prasetya M. Brata. Semuanya materinya deep dan memprovokasi pikiran. Saking banyaknya yang kupelajari selama dua hari pelatihan, aku sampai kepayahan untuk menuangkannya ke dalam tulisan ini secara sistematis. Karena itu, aku akan membuat tulisan berseri tentang topik ini, yaitu Seri Food For Thought.

Jujur saja, memahami ilmu Neuro-Semantics itu betul-betul mengubah cara pikirku terhadap segala masalah di kehidupanku sehari-hari. Hidup itu terasa lebih ringan. Tapi, tentu saja tidak semua materi sudah bisa kuinternalisasi, karena semuanya butuh latihan. Jadi, aku harap tulisan ini selain membantu para pembaca sekalian, dapat juga menjadi pengingat buatku agar memaksimalkan pengaplikasian ilmu-ilmu ini dalam hidupku sendiri.

Lanjutkan membaca “Food For Thought #1: Neuro-Semantics”

Ujian ABRSM, And Some Powerful Lessons I Learned On Music Mastery

Setelah satu tahun yang penuh (well, not literally) dengan latihan, les, diskusi, tes di depan guru di tempat kursusku Swaraharmony, akhirnya pada bulan Maret ini aku ikut ujian ABRSM kelas akhir, yaitu grade 8. ABRSM adalah ujian musik bersertifikat internasional, dan instrumen yang kumainkan untuk ujian ini adalah biola. Aku sendiri sebelumnya tidak menyangka bahwa persiapan ujian ini akan seberat, sepusing, dan secapek ini. Karena, musik, seperti halnya ilmu-ilmu lain, butuh pemahaman dan kemampuan berpikir ‘beyond’ jika sudah menanjak ke kelas profesional.

Satu hal yang disalahpahami olehku sebelumnya (dan orang-orang awam lainnya) adalah bahwa bermain musik hanyalah soal bermain nada dan irama tertentu dengan benar. Padahal, jika dilihat secara keseluruhan, musik itu pada dasarnya media penyampaian cerita dan pesan lewat suara. Sama seperti penyampaian cerita di novel (lewat kata-kata), atau lukisan (lewat garis dan warna-warna).

Sepanjang sejarah, orang-orang menciptakan dan memainkan musik untuk menyampaikan pesan-pesan tertentu. Dulu, para budak di Amerika menyanyikan lagu ketika mereka dipaksa bekerja di perkebunan yang panas. Lagu-lagu tersebut memberikan mereka harapan bahwa suatu hari mereka akan bangkit melawan penindasan.

Di negara tertentu, ketika terjadi krisis, para musisi daerah memainkan lagu untuk mengkritik pemerintah, untuk membangkitkan kesadaran masyarakat, dan menyuarakan aspirasi mereka yang tak terdengar. Ingat Iwan Fals? Yes, that’s what he did ketika negara kita terkena krisis ekonomi di era Seoharto.

Lanjutkan membaca “Ujian ABRSM, And Some Powerful Lessons I Learned On Music Mastery”

Tayang Perdana Filmku: ‘Menjadi Pandu Ibuku’

Beberapa minggu yang lalu, pemimpin redaksi, Om Furqan, menawarkan agar filmku yang berjudul “Menjadi Pandu Ibuku” tentang petani Kendeng di-screening di Kafe Kaka, Bandung dan didiskusikan dengan pelajar-pelajar SMA yang tergabung dalam Future Club. Aku jadi nervous, karena aku tahu filmku ini kalah lomba tingkat SMA dan rasanya ga layak ditonton orang banyak. Tapi, atas dorongan Mama, aku pun menyiapkan diri.

Hari Jumat lalu (29/9), pagi-pagi sebelum berangkat ke tempat acara, aku ngebut selesain editing film yang masih banyak kekurangan itu. Tukang bangunan mondar-mandir ngecat rumah, mama-papa bolak-balik belanja keperluan, Reza tidur karena sakit, jadi aku sendirian di ruang tamu ngutak-ngatik laptop di atas karpet, berharap film-nya turn out good dan neat. Fiuh, lumayan bikin stres, padahal jam 1 siang aku harus sudah berangkat.

Aku dan mama berangkat pakai kereta. Sesampainya di Kafe Kaka, ternyata beberapa ortu Homeschooling teman Mama sudah datang, dan beberapa teman-teman HS.

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A Little Note from TOSS Idea

 I was actually not really interested in attending motivational events, unlike my mom. It is inspiring, of course, but somehow I thought such event was not really helpful and effective in improving my life in the long term. But then I thought maybe it was because I hadn’t found the appropriate one yet, until someday I joined a public speaking class (which is also a motivational event) that coached by Om Prasetya M. Brata and Pakde Prie GS. That was like a turning point in my life in general, eventhough the topic was simply about how to speak well in front of people and to elevate writing skill to a whole new level (and I forgot to post anything about this cuz I’m a horrible procrastinator yuhu! *high-fiving my fellow procs).

And just two days ago, I attended an event called TOSS Idea. Basically, there were 21 speakers with variety of expertises sharing ideas dan knowledges (all in english), each for 10 minutes. I wasn’t afraid that I might not understand their speaking, because as long as it’s not in british and indian accent, it’s all right (you know, I don’t understand a word in Harry Potter films without reading the sub).

The event was held in Intitut Francais Indonesia that located inside the Embassy of France. The auditorium of the event was relatively small but really nice and comfy. The audio and stage lighting system was also seem professional and fancy.

By the way, I’m not gonna review all the speeches (there were 21 of them duh). I’m just gonna write some of the ideas that I personally relate to and inspire me the most.

Lanjutkan membaca “A Little Note from TOSS Idea”

Bertemu Raisa dan Isyana: Memetik Hikmah tentang Persatuan

Awal pekan lalu, aku diundang oleh Tante Sundari Mardjuki (penulis novel Genduk, keren lho!) untuk menghadiri media gathering dalam acara promosi lagu kolaborasi Raisa dan Isyana. Saat aku dapat kabar itu dari Mama, tentu saja, seperti sewajarnya, aku melontarkan ungkapan kebahagiaan; Alhamdulillah! Selama ini kedua penyanyi ini hanya bisa kulihat lewat layar hape, komputer, dan spanduk-spanduk yang berkibaran di pinggir jalan raya Bandung. Suara mereka pun hanya bisa kudengar lewat speaker hape, komputer, dan cafe-cafe. Aku sendiri tidak pernah mendambakan untuk dapat bertemu langsung dengan mereka, tapi ketika datang kesempatan seperti ini, kenapa tidak?

Maka pada siang hari aku dan Mama berangkat ke hotel Crowne Plaza di Jalan Lembong, karena sesuai yang tertera di poster undangan, acara dimulai jam tiga di hotel tersebut. Setibanya di sana, ternyata para tamu media belum datang. Baru sekitar jam 4, orang-orang berkumpul di ruang hotel yang setengah terbuka. Aku cepat-cepat duduk di kursi paling depan. Di sana aku berkenalan dengan salah satu wartawan dari Kompas. Dia bertanya padaku dari media apa, dan kujawab saja blogger. Selain itu, ada juga wartawan Sindo, Republika, majalah Glam, dan lain sebagainya.

Lanjutkan membaca “Bertemu Raisa dan Isyana: Memetik Hikmah tentang Persatuan”

My Internship Experience #1

Selama sebulan aku mengikuti magang di tempat pembuatan film dokumenter bernama Watchdoc. Dalam sebulan itu, aku mendapatkan untaian pengalaman-pengalaman berharga yang sayang jika disimpan saja di memori. Maka, untuk menyimpan itu semua, aku menuliskannya  dengan bentuk jurnal di sini. Tantu aku tak bisa menceritakan semuanya dengan sangat detil, karena nanti malah jadi novel tersendiri 😀  Hope you enjoy my story

17-18 Oktober

Selesai mem-packing sejumlah pakaianku ke dalam koper, juga beberapa buku, laptop, dan alat mandi, aku menaiki mobil dan meluncur ke kantor Watchdoc di Bekasi. Setelah mengantre selama berbulan-bulan, pada pertengahan Oktober ini akhirnya aku mendapatkan kesempatan magang di sana. Bagaimana perasaanku? Excited, tapi sekaligus nervous. Untuk pertama kalinya selama 4 tahun menjalani homeschooling, aku mencoba keluar dari zona nyaman dan mengeksplor ilmu di tempat yang asing.

Sebelum memutuskan untuk ikut program magang, aku sempat menonton film-film dokumenter buatan Watchdoc. Judulnya, Samin vs. Semen. Film itu bercerita tentang  petani di Kendeng yang berjuang melawan ekspansi lahan oleh perusahaan Semen. Hal pertama yang tercetus di pikiranku adalah, wah ternyata ada ya, orang-orang yang bikin film-film seperti ini. Aku juga terkesima dengan kualitas produksi film tersebut, termasuk soundtrack-nya yang ciamik (seketika aku menetapkan hati agar suatu hari bisa mengaransemen musik-musik seperti itu). Saat itulah, aku memutuskan ingin magang di Watchdoc.


Beruntungnya, ternyata bos-nya Watchdoc, Dandhy Laksono, adalah teman Mamaku di Facebook. Setelah dapat email-nya, aku menuliskan surat penawaran diri untuk magang. Dan tak lama setelah itu, Om Dandhy membalas pesanku dengan positif, meski katanya aku harus sabar mengantre selama berbulan-bulan ke depan.

Perjalanan ke kantor Watchdoc  ternyata sedikit memusingkan, karena untuk mencapai lokasi kantor, aku harus melewati jalanan sempit yang tak terduga. Menariknya, ternyata kantor Watchdoc itu berbentuk rumah! Wah, bekerja di sini akan sama rasanya seperti aku belajar sehari-hari di rumah, pikirku.

Lanjutkan membaca “My Internship Experience #1”